Archive for the ‘Leader’s Library’ Category

Cherish the Days 

By Martha Evans Sparks

 

In our highly mobile society, many people are separated from aging loved ones. Cherish the Days offers inspiration, insight, and practical help for those who face the loneliness and frustration of long-distance caregiving.

As our population ages, the number of caregivers increases, and so does the realization that caregiving is a stressful, demanding task. Here is real help for those who face the challenges of assisting loved ones across town or across the country.

Among other things, Cherish the Days will help you:

  • Manage the stress of long-distance care
  • Cope with manipulative family members
  • Select a nursing home
  • Deal with care receivers who are unsafe drivers

 

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We’ve discovered two books that caught our attention and wanted to pass along.

The Calling Journey: Mapping the Stages of a Leader’s Life Call

By Tony Stoltzfus

Ever wish you had a road map to follow to your God-given destiny?

The Calling Journey is just such a map, revealing the common stages and transitions leaders go through on the pathway to their call. As you read what successful leaders from all walks of life experienced on the destiny road, you’ll gain an amazing perspective on how God is leveraging everything in your own story to make his dream for you come true. Along the way, you’ll learn how to identify key stages in your own journey and build a personal calling timeline. When you discover what God’s agenda is for each stage, you can lean into what he is doing in you instead of fighting the process.

 

Pro-Active Parent Coaching 

By Gregory Bland

The Parenting Book, Pro-Active Parent Coaching: Capturing the Heart of Your Child, is an essential tool for any parent who wants to connect with and empower their children through the discipline of coaching. Written by a dad, pastor, and coach, it is filled with real-life stories, practical tools and application exercises that put coaching in the hands of every parent.

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I Hear the Music – I have to go: Bringing Music, Humor, and Encouragement to Those in Assisted Living Facilities and Rest Homes for More than Fifty Years

By Frank Pawlak

There was once an elderly woman who called Time & Temperature every day, just to hear the sound of another human voice. Did she know it was an automated recording? Maybe, but it didn’t matter-so long as there was something there to lessen her loneliness. Situations like this are not new, especially in nursing homes, where people seemingly go to be forgotten-by family, by friends, and by society. What if you could do something about their loneliness? What if you could make them feel useful, loved, and respected?

Frank Pawlak, a pastor and evangelist, did just that. He spent fifty years ministering to senior citizens, notably through music and the word of God. His stories are many-as are his hilarious anecdotes-but what Frank took away from his ministry was more than just entertainment. Frank Pawlak came to realize that just when you think you’re blessing someone else, you turn out to be the one who is blessed. The nursing home occupants he visited taught him more than he could ever teach them; they showed him more love than he could have given. His amazing journey is chronicled in I Hear the Music-I Have to Go, as Frank lives out the adage, “If you’re looking for something to do with your life, help someone in need!”

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Reflections from Michael Parker, Ph.D.

Coauthor with James Houston of A Vision for the Aging Church

 

 

On the costs of failing to address the needs of our aging population:

Without adequate resources for mobility, many elders face isolation, depression and poor health, and society faces increased costs of care and a loss of the vital contributions of older generations. The first step toward improving this situation comes through gaining insight into the issues and creating a vision for change in which the church is a clear stakeholder.

 

On a Christian vision of the elderly and disabled:

The church is obligated to act as a countercultural, biblically based advocate on critical matters with regard to aging. Churches can and should promote the care and employment of seniors, healthy caregiving practices, caregiving support, late-life planning, aging-in-place initiatives, and strategies for successful aging, and they should uphold the inherent value of dependent, disabled people.

 

On caregiving as a test of character:

Dr. Houston and I think caregiving will be the great test of character this century. Almost half of those eighty-five and older, one of our fastest growing age groups, face the probability of dementia (about two-thirds will be diagnosed with the dreaded Alzheimer’s disease). Recipients of such a diagnosis are virtually guaranteed years of dependency on others. Traditionally, families have provided most late-life care. Very few churches provide systematic help to familial caregivers; community-based, ecumenical partnerships will become a necessity.

 

On how churches benefit from the seniors in their midst:

The ever-growing aging church is no burden; instead, this burgeoning reservoir of accumulated experience and talent can provide a lasting legacy of God’s love to the younger generations. Churches that foster the rich, intergenerational connection available only through our elders will ensure that older and elderly believers can leave their unique legacy of faith and love. The lives of the younger set are enriched, and seniors who become more actively engaged with life also benefit by aging more successfully.

 

On the needs met by this book:

While serving overseas [in the military], I faced a variety of distant caregiving issues with my father and my wife’s father and mother. After my father’s funeral in the States, I returned to my duties where I learned about how common these experiences were for my brothers and sisters in uniform. Moreover, members of the Baby Boomer generation are concerned about their aging parents, their own aging and, perhaps, their calling during their retirement years.

Few seminaries offer an elective course on aging and ministry, though all pastors will have older persons in their congregations. Only a very small number of seminaries offer solid, accredited courses on the implications of a graying church for ministry. In our research, we could not locate one American seminary that has conducted a comprehensive review of its curricula to insure that it is “geriatrically enriched” and truly reflective of our aging congregations and population.

 

On the potential of A Vision for the Aging Church:

Hopefully the publication of this book will challenge the church to examine and evaluate the place of elders in its congregations, to consider the sample state-of-science recommendations made in this book concerning seniors, and to advance the status, purpose and health of all senior members. These gains can be made in the midst of fostering relationships that connect older persons to younger people.

 

Read Reviews for A Vision for the Aging Church here.

 

James M. Houston (M.A., Edinburgh; D.Phil., Oxford) is founding principal, former chancellor and emeritus professor of spiritual theology at Regent College in Vancouver, British Columbia. He is the author of some forty books, including I Believe in the Creator, The Transforming Friendship, In Search of Happiness, The Heart’s Desire, The Mentored Life and Joyful Exiles.

Michael W. Parker (Ph.D./DSW, LCSW, Lieutenant Colonel, U.S. Army Retired [AMEDD]) is associate professor in the School of Social Work and a board member for the Center for Mental Health and Aging at the University of Alabama in Birmingham. He’s also an adjunct associate professor in UAB’s Division of Gerontology and Geriatric Medicine.

 

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New Additions to the Leaders Library!

We’ve been learning a lot about intergenerational ministry lately, and are finding some great resources! Take a look at what’s new in the Leaders Library. From quiet leaders to generational blessings, find some new reading material.

 

Click here to get started!

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Book Review

Leona Bergstrom

Building Below the Waterline: Shoring Up the Foundations of Leadership. By Gordon MacDonald.

“God, do you have a fresh call for a 60-something guy?”

This question, posed by author Gordon MacDonald on the very last page of his recent book, Building Below the Waterline: Shoring Up the Foundations of Leadership, captured the cry of my heart. The entire book pulses with wisdom, insights and honest transparency. But this particular rhetorical question throbs with urgency as I cross off the final months of life in my “fifties.”

One would think from the title that this is another book on becoming an effective leader in the 21st century church. And yes, it has sage advice for all leaders, particularly pastors, about building a strong inner life that will withstand all of the storms of ministry. But, from my vantage point, it is a manifesto for all of us in midlife who wonder if we have what it takes to minister, much less lead, for a lifetime.

Painting an image of crossing the Colorado plains only to butt up against the impenetrable Rocky Mountains, MacDonald depicts a common angst: “You get the feeling you can’t go anywhere. You’re trapped. The illusion of barrierlessness is inverted. ….That’s the perception of more than one midlifer in leadership. The freshness is gone; the fears of mediocrity, of ineffectiveness, of being lost in the shuffle are malignant.”

Do not despair. Gordon MacDonald doesn’t, and his journey of renewal and transformation inspires one to focus again on calling, mission and finishing extraordinarily well.

 

“It was a significant day when I was hit with the question: What kind of an old man do you want to be? And I opted for growth and grace as my old-age lifestyle. …I looked around and discovered I didn’t know many old men who impressed me with the same traits as in Tennyson’s poem “Ulysses.”* Why? Maybe because most men and women never build a growth plan for the old years. And if you don’t plan for the kind of man or woman you want to be when you are eighty (God willing) and begin building that when you are forty or fifty, it’s not likely going to happen.” (pp 28-29)

What MacDonald presents in this 250-page, can’t-put-it-down thesis, is a personally seasoned guide for identifying mission and purpose; for building a strong inner soul that is marked by a deep, intimate walk with God; and for developing relationships with loved ones that are significant, revitalizing, and FUN. He probes like a skilled surgeon around the infections of the inner soul, calling the reader to repentance and renewal. The anecdote is grace – “The older I become the more I realize my condition as a barbarian loved by my Father. And this may be the most important insight that comes with aging. Almost all old people who are growing have certain common traits. One of them is that they know without equivocation that they are sinners. And they have come to appreciate the central importance of grace.” (p. 37)

The book is actually divided into two parts: The Inner Life of a Leader, and The Outer Life of a Leader. The first section addresses the issue of personal spiritual direction, including advice on journaling, praying, studying and growing. The second section offers profound insight into the public side of ministry – including dealing with church conflict, how to guide a church through change and transition, and how to know when it’s time to leave a congregation. Lessons learned by a man who has been a pastor, leader, author, mentor and long-time disciple of Jesus.

The book caused me to reflect and even weep – tears of repentance as well as of anticipation. Through his writings MacDonald has coached me in experiencing anew that “fresh call” for this almost 60 –year-old gal.

 

You may experience the same.

 

*MacDonald states (p. 28), “I love the words of Tennyson in his poem Ulysses. He imagines the old, travel-worn Ulysses brooding on what one might do for an encore after having seen the world:

Tho’ much is taken, much abides; and tho’
We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven; that which we are, we are;
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.

 

Leona Bergstrom is Director of Lifetime Ministries (a division of ChurchHealth), a ministry dedicated to assisting churches in developing powerful and effective programs for and by older adults. Along with her husband, Richard, Leona is co-director of 2nd ½ for Him Ministries of the Baptist General Conference. This review was also published with Converge Worldwide | 2nd 1/2 for Him

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Charles ArnMeet a contributing writer and his work, Charles Arn. Charles will be at ILC – Anaheim presenting, “Influencing Generations through Heart Transplants.”

Heartbeat! How to Turn Passion into Ministry – This new book shows church leaders how to identify existing priorities ad passions among their members, and then how to help them start creative new ministries around their passions.  These “heartbeat ministries” take many unique directions, because they grow out of the special interests, concerns, and life experiences of People.

How to Start a Heartbeat Ministry in Your ChurchA resource to lead a Ministry Planning Team, through the process of creating a new ministry, based on their particular interest and/or passion.  This step-by-step guide will greatly increase the likelihood of a successful new ministry or effective new outreach in your church. 

White Unto Harvest: Evangelizing Today’s Senior AdultsDr. Charles Arn reports on a national research study examining senior adult conversions and recommitments.  Discover key principles for effective outreach to older adults from this book that can be easily applied in any church. 

The New Senior: Preparing Your Church for the Coming Age WaveA rich compilation of insights and recommendations for churches seeking to minister effectively in the coming “age wave.” Charles & Win Arn calls the church beyond the old paradigms of senior adult ministry to a fresh new approach to ministry in today’s aging society.

Dr. Charles Arn serves as Visiting Professor of Outreach and Christian Ministry at the new Wesley Seminary in Marion, Indiana. He completed his master’s and doctoral degrees from the University of Southern California, majoring in Instructional Design and Technology. Read more at HeartbeatMinistries.net.

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Missy Buchanan

Meet Contributing Author Missy Buchanan

Missy Buchanan will be at ILC-Anaheim 2011 presenting, “The Far Side of Life’s Timeline: Reaching the Oldest Old in a Culture of Youth.”

 

Aging Faithfully: 28 Days of Prayer Old age isn’t punishment but a gift from God, says Missy Buchanan. In fact, aging is part of God’s plan. In her typical upbeat style, Buchanan focuses on the positive aspects of aging. Discover what it means to age joyfully every day through these Bible-based meditations, prayers, and practical suggestions. Includes Reflection Questions for groups or individuals.

Don’t Write my Obituary Just Yet: Inspiring Faith Stories for Older Adults The 30 stories in this book give us glimpses into the lives of ordinary people who range from 70 to 100 years old. Some of these folks are active; others are dealing with physical or mental decline. All exemplify how strong faith can help us overcome struggles and sorrows and live in hope.

Talking with God in Old Age: Meditations and Psalms This collection of 42 moving prayerful meditations pairs each devotion with a passage from the Psalms. All express the myriad ways older adults ask themselves, and ask God, “What’s the purpose of my life now that I’m so old?” These prayers flow out of real-life experience, particularly of the frail elderly.

Living with Purpose in a Worn-Out Body: Spiritual Encouragement for Older Adults Devotions written in the first person allow readers to speak directly to God about the pills they take, the walkers they need to be mobile, the ambulances that take away their friends, and other befuddling moments from life. Supporting scriptures from the New Testament and Psalms are included with each meditation.

 

Missy Buchanan writes a monthly column, “Aging Well,” for the United Methodist Reporter and hosts Aging and Faith with Missy Buchanan on Blog Talk Radio.  She has also written for many publications including Presbyterians Today, Christian Association Serving Adults Ministries and Good Morning America’s spirituality page. Read more at www.missybuchanan.com.

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Switch: How to Change Things When Change Is Hard is the latest book by Chip and Dan Heath, authors of Made to Stick, the critically acclaimed bestseller. Switch debuted at #1 on both the Wall Street Journal and New York Times bestseller lists.

Switch asks the following question: Why is it so hard to make lasting changes in our companies, in our communities, and in our own lives? The primary obstacle, say the Heaths, is a conflict that’s built into our brains. Psychologists have discovered that our minds are ruled by two different systems—the rational mind and the emotional mind—that compete for control. The rational mind wants a great beach body; the emotional mind wants that Oreo cookie. The rational mind wants to change something at work; the emotional mind loves the comfort of the existing routine. This tension can doom a change effort—but if it is overcome, change can come quickly.

In Switch, the Heaths show how everyday people—employees and managers, parents and nurses—have united both minds and, as a result, achieved dramatic results:

● The lowly medical interns who managed to defeat an entrenched, decades-old medical practice that was endangering patients.

● The home-organizing guru who developed a simple technique for overcoming the dread of housekeeping.

● The manager who transformed a lackadaisical customer-support team into service zealots by removing a standard tool of customer service
In a compelling, story-driven narrative, the Heaths bring together decades of counterintuitive research in psychology, sociology, and other fields to shed new light on how we can effect transformative change. Switch shows that successful changes follow a pattern, a pattern you can use to make the changes that matter to you, whether your interest is in changing the world or changing your waistline.

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SIGNIFICANT LIVING SEMINAR SERIES

http://www.slstore.org/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=81

VISIONARY PARENTING

Never Too Late series – about being parents of adult children

http://visionaryfam.com/empty-nesters/

PLACE MINISTRIES

Finding your unique “place” in ministry. Self discovery, spiritual gifts.

Designed for all adults, but with great application to midlife and older adults

www.placeministries.org

DVD series, online assessments, participant workbooks:  http://www.placeministries.org/resources.aspx


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