Taking Fresh Stock Of What’s On Life’s Shelf

Pastor John Coulombe

Whether in good health or ill, whether our mileage in life is low or high, whether bodies and ‘tents’ are weathered or in tip top shape, it’s always important to evaluate one’s life’s directions and purposes. That’s perhaps why a new year motivates us to begin fresh, take stock of what’s on the shelves of our lives and to re-stock it for the days ahead. Hezekiah was told by God in Isaiah 38 to set his house in order because the number of his days were few. That’s good advice for all of us, no matter how many days we think we have left.

In case you’re wondering about when my ‘number’ may be up, my calendar reveals that as of January 5, 2011, I perhaps have 1,754 days left to live. I have already lived 23,926 days, which amounts to 65 years, 185 days, including 16 leap years.

When and why did I come up with these wild figures and this wild thought? It was 30+ years ago while reading Psalm 90:10-12: As for the days of our life, they contain seventy years. Or if due to strength, eighty years . . . For soon it is gone and we fly away . . . So teach us to number our days, that we may present to You a heart of wisdom. So—I decided I would begin counting my days once a week, using 70 years instead of 80 because when living and ministering in our previous ministry, a motorcycle was my means of transportation for work—and pleasure! Little did I know at the time I would later deal with cardiac issues and prostate cancer.

But why would I begin what seems like a compulsive behavior? I wanted perspective and I wanted wisdom and my rationale was two-fold: If it’s a lousy day, “I may only have 1,754 days left to live and then I’m outta here!” There is an end in sight and I can hang on a little bit longer. On the other hand, if it’s a lazy day, “I may only have 1,754 days left to live and I, like you, was made with purpose—it’s time to re-evaluate, re-enlist and re-boot!”

This past year, I must confess, I back-slid from my previous New Year’s wish/change list so I have made some new resolutions as to how I want to live in the coming days. I’ve discovered that “If I always do what I always did, I’ll always get what I always got!” . . . and I want to continue to be changed into the image and likeness of my God. So, this past week I re-upped and made several mid-life, uhhh, ‘later-life’ course changes for myself. And I was encouraged by these timeless resolves of Jonathan Edwards from days gone by:

Resolved:

• To live with all my might while I do live;
• To never do anything which I should be afraid to do if it were the last hour of my life;
• To be endeavoring to find out fit objects of liberality and charity;
• To never do anything out of revenge;
• To never suffer the least emotions of anger toward irrational beings;
• To never do anything which, if I should see in another, I should count a just occasion to despise him for, or to think in anyway the more meanly of him;
• To never say anything at all against anybody, but what is perfectly agreeable to the highest degree of Christian honor, agreeable to the lowest humility and sense of my own faults and failings and agreeable to the Golden Rule; and when I have said anything against anyone to bring it to, and try it strictly by the test of this resolution.
• In narrations, never to speak anything but the pure and simple truth.
• To maintain the strictest temperance in eating and drinking. Never to give over nor in the least to slacken my fight with my corruptions, however unsuccessful I may be. And after afflictions, to inquire: ‘What am I better for them? What good have I got by them?’ and ‘What might I have got by them?’
• To never to lose one moment of time, but improve it in the most profitable way I possibly can. That I will live so as I shall wish I had done when I come to die.

(Jonathan Edwards 1703-1758, American Theologian and Preacher)

Love, Pastor John

John Coulombe

Provided by CN Building Adult Ministries Resource Center

When Mid-course Changes Happen

It was 25 years ago—January 1981—that the Forever Young ministry began here in Fullerton under the leadership of Dave Jobe. Seven years later, the Coulombe clan arrived on the scene to carry on Dave’s legacy and work with senior adults.

Remember where you were 25 years ago? The changes that have occurred are staggering—in our lives, culture, world and yes, church. A vital part of healthy living is change, except for the things ordained by God as unchangeable. Healthy things grow; growing things change; changing things challenge us; challenges force us to trust; trust leads to obedience; obedience makes us healthy; healthy things grow! Monuments and museums are important for remembering the past but they can hinder living organisms. When our memories exceed our dreams, life is over for us. I hope we hear God’s voice saying: “I created you to grow. Beloved family, be steadfast—yes; be immovable—yes; but always abound in the work of the Lord, because it matters! Press on!” (1 Cor. 15:58; Phil. 3:14)

Twenty-five years with senior adults here at FEFC has been sweet, meaningful and impacting. But it’s also included these mid-course changes all along the way:

1. Leadership changes: Our directors have changed: Lula Mae and Boyd

Keyes, Jan and Bill Shearman, Pearl and Lou Botka, Jane and Ken Heuer—and now our new directors—Maxine and Walt Williams, as well as other leadership team members along the way.

2. Program-time changes: From lunch meetings to evening meetings, so those still engaged in work and activity during the day could attend.

3. Newsletter changes: Started out with a communication piece called In Touch in black and white; which changed to The Grapevine, continually upgraded, now a multi-colored glossy bimonthly newsletter.

4. Program focus change: Mission statement remains the same, but a move from program oriented activities only, to greater focus on service, outreach and involvement including program planning and leadership being decentralized and carried out by various adult fellowships.

5. Name Change: Forever Young for all these years; now changed to ENCORE! Why? Frankly, we were seeking a fresh name that would attract the next generation of ‘seniors’ (50+ adults). There are an unprecedented number of healthy, capable, experienced adults looking for opportunities in which to invest their time, skills and talents to expand the Kingdom. Encore literally means, “still at it” or “doing it again.” It is an additional performance at the end of a successful concert. And in this case, means there’s more life to be lived after retirement.

6. Role Change for Pastor John and Bambi Encarnacion: Due to the ever expanding

ministry with our 50+ Adults, as well as Pastor John’s health issues with his biological heart, there is another major transition in the works. I will begin to turn over the myriad details required to manage our ministries to Bambi, who is gifted in ministry, administration and gerontology. I will slow down my pace and focus more on my role as pastor rather than innovator/ administrator. The plan is for me to teach, lead, mentor, train, resource, network, lead Evening Chapel Praise and continue to be involved—but walking, not running!

Your prayers are appreciated as I grow make those changes. Remember—change in life is inevitable; growth is not. It’s not wrong to be where you are—but it is wrong to stay where you are! We often come to church and sing “Just as I am,” then leave just as we were. Grow for it!

^{John Coulombe has served for 20 years as Pastor to Senior Adults at First Evangelical Free Church, Fullerton CA}

by John Coulombe

Provided by CN Building Adult Ministries Resource Center

The Key to Christmas – Attitude or Activity?

In his book entitled Jesus Rediscovered, the late Malcolm Muggeridge, British journalist, author and Christian apologist comments on the celebration of Christmas and what might be considered an overexposed and overstated season. He wonders: In the exposition and portrayal of Christ’s birth, literally billions of words, oceans of paint, acres of canvas, and mountains of stone and marble have been expended, not to mention in recent times, miles of film. Is there, then, anything left to say? I ask myself, rather disconsolately, and decide that there is—not because of me, but because of Him.

As we head once again into this gala season of giving thanks and “Holy-days,” preparing to celebrate and send greetings, we are probably asking similar questions: “How can I engage and appraise this season with new eyes, fresh thoughts and a renewed heart of joy and praise?” The story is such a simple one—yet so profound. Max Lucado (in God Came Near) puts it this way:

God became a man . . .. The omnipotent, in one instant, made Himself breakable. He, who had been spirit, became pierceable. He who was larger than the universe became an embryo.

And He who sustains the world with a word chose to be dependent upon the nourishment of a young girl. God as a fetus. Holiness sleeping in a womb. The creator of life being created. God was given eyebrows, elbows, two kidneys and a spleen. He stretched against the walls and floated in the amniotic fluids of His mother. God had come near . . . The Word became flesh.

What inconceivable, incredible, inexpressible, incomprehensible thoughts! God is approachable, touchable, and knowable. Now that’s worth giving thanks and having a celebration or two! However, let’s not forget the message in the little chorus we sing: “Celebrate My birth, celebrate My life, celebrate My truth that made you free. But in all your celebration, don’t forget in your elation, to worship and celebrate Me.”

As we move into the brisk weather of these months, the rich and abundant foods and bustling, bursting schedules, let’s keep in mind that the key to enjoying rather than enduring this season is in our attitude, not our activities.” Our prayer for you is that you let the Word who became flesh break through to your spirit to become your Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. (Isaiah 9:6)

^{John Coulombe has served for 20 years as Pastor to Senior Adults at First Evangelical Free Church, Fullerton CA}

by John Coulombe

Provided by CN Building Adult Ministries Resource Center

Trust in God Affects All of Life

While lying in a hospital bed at St. Jude last August, I was given the privilege of time to re-evaluate my life and life’s work. I discovered that when one’s body is broken, many values change. That which was so important no longer is. And that, which meant so little, strangely means so much. In the middle of the night I spent some precious moments reviewing my outlook on life—and death. When I woke up the next morning I wrote them down, realizing opportunities to think like this are rare and greatly stimulated by being in this kind of place. Here are some of those musings:

1.   God is in control. I’m not. Trust Him. Ps.115:3.

2.   God is not in a hurry. I am. You’re a patient, so be patient. Slow Down. Matt. 6:25-34.

3.   Center your heart on the Lord’s, rather than on your own broken-down heart, John. Focus on Him. Col. 3:1; Phil. 4:6-7.

4.   In the hospital there are always people worse than you. Pray for them—and reach out with a word if you can . . . the man dying a few rooms up . . . people groaning and crying out in the night with pain . . . those too weak to get out of bed. Rom. 12:9-21.

5.   The continuum of life is always present in a hospital. I heard Brahms Lullaby in the hallways each time a baby was born, and there were little groups of people singing God Be With You ‘Til We Meet Again and I Come to the Garden Alone in the rooms of their dying loved-ones. Celebrate both life and death. 1 Cor. 15.

6.   Be grateful for small things, like when you can empty your own ‘water’ unassisted! In everything give thanks, with joy. 1Thess. 5:16-18.

7.   Consider how good it is to have a life partner and friends who care, who sit quietly by your side, kiss you when you’re unlovely, sneak in treats and walk alongside you in the hallways in those embarrassing gowns. Never take friendship for granted. Rom. 12:10-13. (Another thought—those hospital gowns are like insurance policies: neither covers you as well as you think.)

8.   It’s time to make preparations to clean up and pull together the papers, the will, the photos, the details of our lives, both for here and the life to come. Is there anyone whom I need to forgive and make things right? Get with it. 1 Cor. 14:33. Prepare to meet your God. Amos 4:12.

9. Someone needs to set the clocks, work the VCR and DVD player, A/C, sprinklers, computer, balance the checkbook, wash the clothes . . . Teach one another how—now.

10. No matter how inept hospital personnel and doctors can be at times, remember—you could be in Nigeria. Be grateful for what you have.

11. Enjoy the little things in life: a cup of Starbucks coffee (yes, decaf!) smuggled in by friends, a real strawberry milkshake with whipped cream and a cherry on top from Jack-in-the-Box. Savor it, and drink slowly.

12. Don’t waste the precious “pressures” or try to get back to normal too soon. Let the pressures transform and conform you to Christ. 2 Cor. 4.

13. Keep finding your sense of humor and joy. It’s better than some of the meds you’re taking! Be Happy. Prov. 17:22: A cheerful heart is good medicine.

14. Be kind, patient, and hospitable with the hospital personnel who care for you throughout the long days and nights—even though they may not do it perfectly.

Be kind. 1 Cor. 13:4; Eph. 4:32.15. And finally: Prov. 4:23: Above all, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life!

^{John Coulombe has served for 20 years as Pastor to Senior Adults at First Evangelical Free Church, Fullerton CA}

Are You a Spiritual Tourist or Pilgrim?

John Coulombe, Provided by CN Building Adult Ministries Resource Center

In 1869, Mark Twain wrote his book, Innocents Abroad. Here’s a snippet from his thinking: “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely . … Broad, wholesome, charitable views . . . cannot be acquired by vegetating in one’s little corner of the earth.”

Contrary to common thought, Phil Cousineau in his work, The Art of Pilgrimage—The Seeker’s Guide to Making Travel Sacred, suggests that the object of pilgrimage is not rest and recreation nor to get away from it all. Rather, he argues, a pilgrimage throws down a challenge to everyday life. He continues: “travel brings a special kind of wisdom if one is open to it.” There appears to be great purpose to a pilgrimage. It is to be an inward journey to bring even closer those people, places and things that have or have had meaning in our lives over the years—and that requires openness, attentiveness and responsiveness to the surroundings. Cousineau suggests it also requires one be hardy. “They trudge rough roads, put in long days, sometimes live on bread crusts . . . but often sleep well!” In fact, the very word travel comes from an older word, travail, and itself has a Latin root, tripalium, which was a medieval torture rack!

So what lures us to get out and travel? Either it will torture and torment us or there’s a chance it will ‘stretch us’! Not just our bodies, but also our minds, our spirits, our relationships, our understanding. Before the development of tourism, travel was considered to be study. The traveler was out to explore, discover, learn and gain insight. And then the jet plane changed it all. Now that it’s easier to travel around the world on the wings of supersonic jets or via the Internet, it often leaves us casual, thoughtless and heartless about our journeys.

There’s a distinct difference I’ve noted over my years of travel, between being a tourist and a pilgrim:

Tourists . . .are always in a hurry and not quite sure where they are going; are sightseers, who skim the surface; visit the attractive and popular locations and only do so when it is convenient; want everything in life to be comfortable and ‘trouble free;’ look for the high points along the way and take the roads with least resistance and ‘the roads most traveled;’ are often insensitive to and unaware of those around them.

Pilgrims . . .are patient and set their sights not just on the ‘sites,’ but also on the insights and the ultimate goal of the journey; are “experience-makers” who take a risk looking deep inside; visit significant locations and realize not everything in life is timely, handy or always favorable; know it’s not always pleasant, restful, comfy or safe and accept that as part of life; travel the high mountains as well as low valleys, and learn to appreciate and accept both; care and share with those they meet along the way, as well as those with whom they are traveling.

A pilgrim is a wanderer with a purpose. So, fellow pilgrims, awaken the wonderment of the trip of a lifetime, filled with meaning, surprise and blessing.

^{John Coulombe has served for 20 years as Pastor to Senior Adults at First Evangelical Free Church in Fullerton, California.}

The Quality of Engagement

John Coulombe, Provided by CN Building Adult Ministries Resource Center

It all has to do with change. Winter blows in and snaps the buds, flowers and blooms into a new cycle of growth, renewal and life. As with the seasons of nature, so it is with the nature of man. God gave us the springtime and a myriad of other phenomenal acts of nature to help us understand the phases and stages of our own lives. Without change, life becomes monotonous monotone, routine, dreary, boring and colorless. Brian C. Stiller, President of Tyndale University College and Seminary in Toronto, recently wrote an article for the school’s newsletter (The Issachar Notes), which caught my attention on “Neoteny.” Yes, it’s a new word for me as well. It’s a zoological term having to do with the retention of juvenile features in adult animals. But where it grabbed me was when it referred to the retention of youthful qualities by adults. In simple terms, neoteny is the “quality of engagement in which the world is as attractive to me as a 61 year-old as it is to an active preschooler.” (Bennis and Thomas in Geeks and Geezers)

Bryan and Brandon, our three and five year-old grandsons, see life through the extraordinary and supernatural eyes of Superman and SpiderMan—they’re strong, able to leap buildings in a single bound, climb and swing from highrise structures and protect innocent, helpless people from the bad guys. These enthusiastic and loveable little boys are hopeless romantics, convinced that there is nothing they can’t do. In Stiller’s words: “Children, not burdened by failure, made cynical by the frivolous or becoming cautious by the unknown, model this quality of engagement.” Stiller continues: “Having ‘seen it all,’ having been exposed to the hyperbole of televangelists, having listened to the partisan polemics of politicians and having felt the disabling hurt of personal failure, life too easily slips into the tactics of caution, as much for a 30year old as for a 60year old.”

We have much to learn from our children and grandchildren about life. For too long we have listened to the hearts of our own kind, rather than the children. Jesus presses us to be as children, to overcome the anxious “why” with the hopeful “why not?” Edith Wharton stated it well: “In spite of illness, in spite even of the archenemy sorrow, one can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways.” Perhaps we should pay less attention to our expired prescriptions and more to our expired hopes and dreams! Which really is the more dangerous, if indeed we are to be living lives of faith? “If a person lives many years, let him rejoice in them all . . .Rejoice, O young man, in your youth, and let your heart cheer you in the days of your youth . . . Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the evil days come and the years draw near of which you will say, “I have no pleasure in them . . “(Ecclesiastes 11:8-9; 12:1)

A Neotenic Prayer

Lord, help us remain childlike, but keep us from being childish.

Keep us playing, full of giggles, smiles and fun.

Keep us dreaming, but wake us from our restful slumber when it’s time to get up.

Keep us kind, when others are mean.

Keep us tender, but make us strong.

Keep us inquisitive, but protected when boundaries are forgotten.

Keep us from failing the same old tests; help us learn from our falls.

Keep us trusting, but with discernment.

Keep us learning, but make us wise.

Keep us praying, simple and true.

Keep us talking (and listening) without airs, with family as well as Father.

Keep us growing and keep us pruned.

Keep us fruitful, sun-ripened, fresh and sweet.

Lord, change us so we’ll look more like You.

And keep us changing and committed to the things You ordained as unchangeable.

^{John Coulombe has served for 20 years as Pastor to Senior Adults at First Evangelical Free Church in Fullerton, California.}